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Epilogue. 

Every morning, I will tell myself to breath. Not simply for the sake of living, but breath so that it goes through my whole body. Fill it up.

I will tell myself to exhale slowly. Not simply for the sake of making it a full cycle, but to let the toxic thoughts out. Let it out. 

Just like breathing, I will tell myself to smile.

And with that hope, it will get easier as days go by so I won’t have to remind myself every time. 

Love & Hope.

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Tales of the busy procrastinator of a 20-something.

I should change my blog to the title as above and never post anything. Haha!

As I transition to a new job scope and handling the rush that comes with Christmas by preparing hand-made hampers for our clients, I have very much abandoned posting on my blog for a long while. It’s been very tiring on my body that I even forgotten about the German lessons I’m taking on duolingo (and that only requires 10 minutes of my day!) My body has gone through so much of internal conflict that I feel sorry for it. -hugs myself-

What’s the point in pushing your body to the limit continuously? It’ll get back to you in disastrous ways. I have had indigestion, cold and sore throat over the last 2 weeks. Not to mention that when we get worked up, our body tends to want to take in anything sugary. It’s good to treat yourself sometimes but stress eating is not good (ask anyone about it – but we would still do it).

I honestly have no idea what this post is about. Haha just random ramblings.

Moral of the story: Stop stressing about things. Leave work to work. Give your body sufficient rest, even if you feel you don’t need it. Treat your body as another person, a loved one. Drink loads of water. Enjoy nature during lunch.
And most importantly, Christmas is the season of giving but you don’t need to stress about expensive things. Give your time. Give your presence. Help someone in need.

Love & Peace.

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Look.

I look in the mirror
And staring right at me is someone I do not know.
Who is this person?
How did I change into being so insecure?

I look in the mirror
Telling myself that I am beautiful but
As I walk away,
I turn around with nothing but doubt
Written on my face.

I look in the mirror
Practicing smiles and laughter
Only to feel the need to cover up my
Real feelings.

I look in the mirror
Wanting to be who I really am
But feeling stuck
Feeling pulled by my own shadow
To stay this way

I look in the mirror
And pray for a better tomorrow.

Love & Peace.

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Hip Hip Hooray! A nomination!

one-lovely-blog

Hey all! Hope your weekend is going smoothly so far! It has been so hectic so this post is rather belated, but nonetheless still valid. I am so glad to announce that I have been nominated for this amazing award of One Lovely Blog Award by StephJ. It’s truly an honour and to know that all the heartfelt posts I’ve been carving out has lead to this nomination *wipes tears of joy away from my face*. Once again, thank you so much for nominating me for this award. I look forward to the next chapter of our adventure!

The rules are simple as A,B,C…

  • Thank the nominator and link them.
  • List the rules and display the award.
  • Add 7 facts about yourself.
  • Nominate 7 other bloggers and let them know via a comment.

7 fact about myself:

  1. I am still a Disney lover. Well, do we ever grow out of it? Despite how life can seem to mess up the little joys in our childhood, I’d like to stop over-thinking every situation and just enjoy them for what they are.
  2. I’m terribly scared of animals. Yup, cats and dogs and the rest of them. I would love to get over my fear of dogs one day though.
  3. I find myself rather confusing and indecisive most times. That…maybe I should not put this as one of my 7 facts…but it won’t kill me, right? We all have felt this before…have you?
  4. One of my bucket list items is to break out into a perfect dance number on the dance floor with tons of back up dancers – the kind you see on movies. How does one choreograph a club full of people???
  5. I love cloud gazing. Sure, it’s not as magical as star gazing but it makes me incredibly happy and calm, and fill me up with inspiration and positivity.
  6. My dream is to be a professional singer/ songwriter performing internationally, and helping to eradicate human trafficking. Now, I just need to work on my patience to learn an instrument.
  7. Last but not least, to insert some wackiness into this list, I am a totally crazed Minion fan! So much so that my boss got me stickers with minions and my name on it. I have the umbrella, most of the collection from the McDonald’s Happy Meals, flip flops too! 🙂 Let your inner kid shine, most times.

And my nominations goes to…

Wow! That wasn’t easy!
And I just had the biggest shock of my life by pressing the “back” button without having saved this as a draft! Thank you, auto save! P/s: ALWAYS save your work!

Go forth and be awesome, my dear ones.

Love & Peace.

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Breaking Media.

Many a times, we are highly influenced by the media around us. Now, I say “many a times” when I actually mean every time, no matter how much we can fight it. Have you ever asked yourself why are some things deemed more acceptable than others, or what makes this more attractive than the others?

Media is a powerful tool that can be used as both the devil and the angel. I believe I have touched this on a past post, but I can’t stress how hard the media has a MASSIVE impact on our lives.

Today, I would like to touch on something that is close to me: The Fashion Industry. Before I continue, I’d like to point out that I love the fashion industry but what I can’t stand by is the deadly impact it has on young minds. We are all aware of how bone thin the industry loves their models to be. Despite having a season of plus-size models walking famous runways, it soon went back to square 1. As a student, I was deeply peeved off and I still am. I’ve read my fair share of fashion magazines, studied them, worked with some of the local publications to say that even though there’s always a section of how to love your body, it’s still rare to non-existent to see regular sized models on the spreads. The closest would be the popular faces gracing the covers.

With that said, I won’t say that the bone thin models are aliens (they could be) to be that skinny. They’re still humans and we all know some people have high metabolism.

But what about the message we’re sending to our young and the impressionable? I have found myself sometimes wishing I was skinnier and prettier when flipping through magazines and watching TV. We are always constantly being sold this idea of “perfection” that it makes us almost impossible to love our bodies for what it is, just cos we are always just not that good enough.

It’s a torturous cycle. I would lie to say it doesn’t affect me still, but at least I’m smarter and stronger now to diss those thoughts.

This idea of perfection has to stop. It’s getting old and boring. The new trend should be enjoying your body for what it is. After all, if you really want to lose that extra weight, isn’t it better to love your body for putting through the vigorous regimes you’re gonna dump at it?

Just saying.

Love & Peace.

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Breaking Bad Habits.

Took a Sabbath break yesterday but my mind was constantly thinking of what I should write for my next post.

Two things I’ve learnt about myself recently:
1) I am constantly worried about being “the right one”, “the role model” that I have put on burdens in my life that causes so much stress. So much so that the minute I make a mistake, I take it out on myself, in the harshest way possible. That’s when my hormones start screwing up, causing depression mood swings.
2) I am afraid of going completely out of my comfort zone. Yes, we all are and it’s completely understandable. So, when someone comes into my life, throwing me into areas I’m not familiar with, the first thing I do is run for cover and find reasons why this won’t work out.

There are a million things that causes anxiety and depression, but these are mine…in a nut shell.

Depression and anxiety are like underaged teens high on drugs with raging sex hormones. You can only control it so much, but sometimes it gets influenced by external factors that it decides to go against your will, leaving you as the “parent” overwhelmed and worried. I hope I’m making sense. I’m not a parent, so feel free to rectify this analogy.

My belief is that no amount of medicines or counselling can help unless you decide to change yourself. Yes, I know how harsh that may sound but imagine this: you can’t feed a child vegetables unless he/she opens the mouth in order to try it. Same thing, no? Change won’t happen unless you want it.

In order for that to happen, stop killing your spirit everytime you feel down. You can’t fight fire with fire. Water the negativity out and find something that makes you happy every day, even if it’s a pair of minion socks 🙂

Love & Peace.